5:30am- Two minutes after climbing into our bed…
Bishop- “Dad…is it wake-up time?”
Me – “No, Buddy. It is still dark, go back to bed.”
2 minutes later-
Bishop- “Dad…is it wake-up time?”
Me – “No, Buddy, I am tired go back to bed. Go snuggle Mommy.”
A minute later.
Bishop – “What’s that noise Dad?
Me -“Buddy, that is the dog barking because you woke him up.”
Bishop -“So it’s wake up-time?
Me- “Yup. Let’s go downstairs”
This has been my morning every morning for the past year or so. There are some mornings that I play possum and pretend I don’t hear him. Some mornings I get woken up in the middle of a dream and wish I could return to the paradise island I just left. And some mornings I am thankful that my day is started early. But every morning is the same. I am having a conversation with my 3 1/2 year old son who hangs on every word of mine.
I have been told multiple times “wow, he looks and acts just like you” and sometimes that is the best compliment I could ever receive. Sometimes it is a nice slice of humble pie. Being a Dad I am on stage every day and what I say and do leaves an impression on my kids. Just like my Dad left an impression on me.
If I get angry and lose my temper, they do the same with their brothers. If I use sarcasm they become little smart-asses and have an answer for everything. If I take a deep breath, stop and think about my words before I say them to the best of their ability they will try to do the same.
It is the biggest responsibility I have and I absolutely love it. But it’s hard work. The hardest job that I will ever have. The sons I raise them to be will (hopefully) translate into the men they will become…but it’s more than words that shape them.
If I come home from work and give them an immediate hug and tell them I missed them and I loved them they will learn how to balance work and life. If I treat my wife with love, respect, and affection, they will do the same for every woman they meet. If I work hard and put in 100% whether it is on a project in the house or work to provide for my family with my job, they will be successful in all they do.
Just as I said to Ethan, my 9 year old step son last week while we were talking about consequences of having a bad attitude, “for every action there is a reaction. Your words mean more than just words. You can say you’re sorry but do you really mean it? Follow through and show that you have learned better.”
These are life lessons that they learn early, at the time they don’t make sense, but the older they become they start to be an echoing reminder and self reflection of where we fall and how we can improve.
When we started to talk about this blog I was trying to think of the ultimate purpose. Was this for me? Or was it bigger?
Putting my thoughts out there to the world can be pretty vulnerable experience. Especially when one of my biggest flaws are writing skills (future post on that later) but we live our own little world and I have realized through opening up I can help other people who may be going through the same thing.
My goal with this blog is to inspire others. To share things that I am experiencing everyday, to help you know that you are not alone.
More than words. Take action. Always know you are on stage. Live your life like you would want your children to. Always try to get better than the previous day and remember that every action has a reaction. Those are my thoughts every morning when I wake up.
One thought on “More than words.”
Very well said son,I try to be positive myself every day but life can be challenging. Living with chronic back and left leg pain has become a daily thing for me. I think back on my life and all of the jobs I had and now I am paying for it.I am thankful that you and Jess have grown into wonderful adults and there is not a day that goes by that I think of you two.
I miss the days when we used to go fishing on Eel Street in Boscawen. Remember that bass we caught and a few days later you and Shawn caught it again.
The times we went to the beach in Maine and got sunburned but it was worth the trip, the times of you kids playing home run derby in the back yard and hockey in the streets.
I may be an older lady now but I am still a child at heart.
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