It’s just after 7am on Wednesday morning and I’m mid-flight to Raleigh, NC. I’ll be spending the next few days there with my team and to say I’m looking forward to the slow down Southern charm (and the comforts of my favorite hotel and spa) is an understatement. I’m expectant of a few days of recharging, God knows I need it.
I’m an independent, headstrong woman. I am confident, loving, successful, articulate, nurturing, intelligent, and even occasionally charismatic. But I am also very deeply flawed. I struggle to realize my worth, show myself grace, and quite frankly keep it all in check.
This past month I’ve really been a mess. It’s been one of the most trying times of my life. The stressors of being a good wife, mom, Christian, leader, daughter, granddaughter, friend, human have hit me hard. So much so that I’ve had nights where I’ve gone to bed crying and woken up to find new tears immediately falling onto my cheeks. Gosh, this is hard for me to write. I’m finding myself welling up as a type out these words.
I’m overwhelmed and I know it. But I’m loved and supported, and I know that, too.
This post isn’t about everything that is going wrong in my life right now. Since I’ll spare you all those details. Instead, it’s about what is going right and the importance of having “your people”.
For me, getting through this last month, which I’m confident will someday be a character builder, would not have been the journey it is without my God and my people to push me through it. These people include my parents, my kids, and my husband. But it also includes a close friend that I can tell anything to without fear of judgement.
If you don’t have this person in your life, seek them. You need them. If not right now, the time will come you will. So find them now, hold onto them, and cherish their friendship.
It took a quick text exchange with my girlfriend and she was there. I poured my heart out over a cup of Starbucks and she listened intently. She poured into me with thoughtful, caring, well-intended questions. She aligned with me in a way only she could. My struggles are like hers and her heart is like mine. She loves the same great God and just being in her presence, I could feel His. She is a builder, not a breaker. She gets me, she encourages me, and I pray I’m half the friend to her that she is to me.
I left Starbucks yesterday wearing, not new, but polished armor. My coffee cup empty, and my life cup full. Today, I will show myself grace. I will breathe in and breathe out. Today I will not let worry consume me. Today I am booked for a deep tissue massage at 7pm at the hotel spa and I intend to enjoy it throughly.